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Sunday, May 25, 2008


It`s official.
The last day of school is MY worst day of my teenage life.


List of crazy things that happened on the 23/5:

01. Got really excited because I won`t be involved in cleaning the classroom and I would be preparing for the JGT.

02. Feeling good for not having anything heavy to bring.

03. Instructed to give out consent forms to Sec 1s.Gosh.

04. Awarded a pen at first,but exchanged it for a cool waterbottle.

05. Got the 4th position in class.

06. Helped in the Big Breakfast by serving food to classmates before me.(Actually,me and my other friends looked like we were working in a factory.If that was so,I would be the buttering executive.)

07. Got scolded by Mdm Fauziah at rehearsal because we did a mic test.(She screamed at us because we`re not supposed to do that.How`re we supposed to know?! I got pissed off,of course.Well,Rui Yang did too.And his complaints were much,much worse.)
08. Changed to nice clothes backstage.(I was my own hairstylist,make-up artist and accessoriser.When I put on my necklace,I stared into the red heart.At that moment,a memory breezed past me.Whoa.)
09. Malay band boys were supporting us.Amazing.Sulaiman cheered me up,too.
10. Ms Zaleha gave us advice.Don`t clap.
11. The show had begun.The band boys cheered us on again.I was beginning to like them.
12. Finally,our turn.A LOT of people clapped and cheered for us.That made me smile so much that my mouth hurted(literally).We sang.I enjoyed the song.(WOW.)
13. Heard the judges comment on us.Really sucked.
14. Went backstage.Heard Ben somehow scolding us.After that,I had the urge to cry.Ran to the toilet cubicle and tears instantly flowed from my eyes.A river of tears had been formed.(What do you expect from someone whose dream of stardom gets crushed?)
15. Changed back to normal.Depression starts to settle into me.
16. Still backstage,I sang the songs the soloists were singing.
17.When we had to come out again for the finale,when JYAC was called out,NOT A SINGLE SOUL clapped or cheered.Only silence.
18. Ben told us that we will still continue singing accapella.Not joining competitions unless necessary.Well,okay.
19. Went out of the hall.Felt like waiting for the assembly to end.So,I waited.
20.I saw some people that I knew,only,they didn`t see me.Like I was some kind of ghost.The sad part is,NO ONE COMMENTED ON OUR(OR MY) PERFORMANCE.
21. Parent-Teacher Dialogue.Father was there.I was late,yes.That sucked too.
Well,that is the list.What I`m so pissed off about is that no one smsed me,called me or talked to me about the JGT.Well,except for Mumtaz.
YOU ROCK GURL!
Why?!
If I really suck,or if the JYAC really screwed up,tell me laa.At least I know that you`re concerned.The longer you keep it from me,the more depressed I`m gonna feel.We`ll learn from our mistakes.
I`m going off topic for a while.I really need to get this off my chest.Okay,I declare that my dad hates me.He never talks to me.Even if he wants to,it would be a scolding.But why?I know that he loves my maid more than me,but,I`m his daughter.I really want him to carry out his responsibility..as my dad.[Problem #1]
This is the other thing I want to let out.Let`s start off with a question.How would you feel if your friend were to die?You`ll feel sad right?What if she has the intention to end her life?Personally,I feel that she`s being selfish because she`s only thinking of her own problems than what problems other people who love and care for her wold encounter when she leaves this world.Period.[Problem #2]
Obviously,Problem #3 is at the top,coloured in green.The JGT thingy.
Oh JYAC,I guess I got my hopes up too high.Maybe we`re not talented enough.These days,people don`t appreciate the "melodyless" of the song we were trying to deliver.
Oh ________,please don`t do it.Keep holding on.God will help you,rest assured.Just don`t do these types of stupid acts.
Oh STICKMAN,how I yearn for your presence! I really need you to comfort me right now 'cause I`m shrouded by a fog of agony and distress.
all i can do is sigh...