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Saturday, July 5, 2008


Depression`s such a wonderful disease.One second you`ll feel bad.The next,you`ll be worse.

i feel like crying now.

everything`s going downhill.

why am i feeling like this?

i mean,i didn`t do anything wrong(so far).

just think.

i`m going to lose quite some friends.

three,actually.

maybe more.

friend #1 : possibility of moving to england at the age of eighteen.(she`s 15 this year so she`s got 3 more years)

friend #2 : decided on committing suicide if failure of EOY examinations becomes reality.(probably happening end of this year)

friend #3 : going back to homeland(maybe this week).fucking husband of hers.

damn.

because of all this stupid people(joking,just kidding),i can`t concentrate on my studies.

why?!

but,about friend #3,she`s probably gonna run away from home.

damn.

but i gotta hide this,right?

so,whenever i`m depressed,i think of this:

yesterday,me,faizah and munirah helped rui yang,benjamin and ivan carry the equipment(for choir,not sports,haha) up to the 4th floor.

i was holding the keyboard stand.

munirah..i forgot.

faizah was carrying the score supporter.

the boys..the keyboard larhh.

then rui yang was behind faizah.

i was behind rui yang.

the funny part is,rui yang poked faizah`s back and butt with the keyboard.

i wanted to have fun,so i poked his butt with the stand i was holding.

he showed no reaction!

wth.

faizah ran away from him,but him..he didn`t even scold me.

weird!

then,when we were at the 4th floor classroom putting the things back,faizah wanted to pass the plastic bag of plugs to rui yang.

guess what??

he so-called kneeled down before her,looking up at her with innocent eyes while stretching out his arms and supported the bag with his hands-one hand below and one hand on the handle.

SWEET!

it was as though he was proposing to her!!

such a cute couple.hahas.

come to think of it,those incidents really do cheer me up.

hooray for faizah and rui yang!

"why are you keeping things from me?"
those words keep repeating in my mind,like a broken recorder.
words spoken by my sister.
i mean,hello,they`re called 'secrets'.
am i fated to lose the ones close to me?
will my husband leave me because he`s in love with someone else?
will my best friends die of incurable diseases?
will my sister leave me because she and her husband plan to migrate?
only time will tell.
but i can`t wait.